While I haven’t shared much about it publicly, we (my husband and I) have been on a journey with this little guy for the past ten years that, at times, has stretched us beyond our limit. There have been many, many hard days. More tears have been shed and prayers prayed over this one child than I could ever count.
We got to a point in early February when we knew that we had done all that we could possibly do on our own to help him. There isn’t one stone we haven’t turned.
That week was full of tears. Big, fat, ugly tears. They spilt out of me and refused to stop. I could barely even pray because my entire body would shake so hard whenever I tried. When I did, all I could repeat over and over is, “God, why won’t you move this mountain? Why??”
No answers came.
Instead, the Lord took me to Deuteronomy 2:3 which says, “You have circled this mountain long enough.”
It was exactly how I felt yet couldn’t adequately convey. The Spirit truly does intercede with words when we cannot! My family has circled this mountain for an exhaustingly long time and I was so ready to be done.
Maybe you have your own mountain that you’ve been circling. Why won’t it move? Why does God allow it?
I don’t know why.
But, here’s what I do know...
Among the many names ascribed to God in the Bible, one of the most intimate is Counselor.
As our Counselor, He listens, He advises, He directs, and He guides. Psalm 32:8 tells us, “I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my loving eye on you.”
As I spent more and more time with my Counselor during that hard week, I felt increased peace in knowing that He wouldn’t allow an immovable mountain in our life if there wasn’t a greater purpose for it.
By the end of the week, my prayer had slowly changed from, “Why won’t you move this mountain?” to “Lord, help us climb it.”
And so, we began.
For the past four weeks, my boy and I have been going to a real-life counselor. We ride hand-in-hand just like you see in this picture. He scrolls through my music. We sing and we laugh. Sometimes we don’t say a word and simply enjoy the quiet. It’s his moment and we make it special.
Through play therapy, his counselor has been learning the nuts and bolts and intricate wiring of my child. As she says with the sweetest smile, “He’s very, very complex!”
Yes, he is! So wonderfully complex!!
Yesterday she mapped out a plan on how to move forward. And, do you want to know the best part? She isn’t intimidated by the climb one bit.
So, neither are we.
This mountain will take a long time to scale. It will require great effort and even greater endurance. But, inch-by-inch, we will make it. And, once we do, my goodness, I cannot even imagine the view that awaits us!
I know that many of you who are reading this have your own immovable mountains in front of you. Maybe, like me, your heart is overburdened for your baby. You see his challenges, you feel her pain. You are trying your absolute best to help them, and yet, it doesn’t seem to be enough.
You want the mountain to move but it just won’t budge.
Or, maybe it isn’t your child. Maybe it’s your spouse. Maybe it’s a family member. Your job. Finances. Loneliness. Fear. Depression. Purpose. Loss of faith.
Whatever name you assign to your mountain, instead of praying it away, tell the Lord that you’re ready to climb it.
While these ten years have been hard, each day has grown my faith. For had we not faced these challenges, I wouldn’t know the Lord, my Wonderful Counselor, in the intimate way that I do.
This mountain will continue to drive me to my knees again and again until the day we stand at the top and sing a song of praise, thanking the Lord for guiding us each and every step.
And, that alone will make it all worth it.
Your immovable mountain won’t move because there’s a greater purpose and greater value in keeping it there.
Get ready for the climb. Trust in your guide. And, join me at the top.
Rebecca SmithFirst, I am a child of God. And, like a child, I am always learning and growing. The more I know Him, the more I love Him. Second, I am a wife to a good man. Missions is his thing while teaching women to love God’s Word is mine. Third, I am a mama to three plus a sweet cockapoo who thinks he’s #4. My children are my ongoing sanctification. Fourth, I am a passionate advocate of all things healthy & natural and a dreamer/designer. Old friends call me Becky, newer ones call me Rebecca, and the most intimate ones call me Beck. You can just call me friend.